Incorrect Warhammer Quotes

 Courtesy of: https://incorrect-quotes-generator.neocities.org/

Fulgrim: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Mortarion: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.
Angron: I got distracted about halfway through.
Magnus: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

Big-E, Malcador, and Dorn are sitting on a bench
Magnus: Why do you guys look so sad?
Big-E: Sit down with us so we can tell you.
*Magnus sits down*
Malcador: The bench is freshly painted.

Sanguinius: If Guilliman and I were drowning, who would you save?
Leman Russ: You two can’t swim?
Guilliman: It’s a hypothetical question, Leman Russ! who would you save?
Leman Russ: my time and effort.

Lion: Anyone d-
Guilliman: Depressed?
Fulgrim: Drained?
Angron: Dumb?
Lorgar: Disliked?
Lion: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people ...

Kharn: I'm a reverse necromancer.
Angron: Isn't that just killing people?
Kharn: Ah, technicality.

Slaanesh: Can I be frank with you guys?
Nurgle: Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.
Khorne: Can I still be Khorne?
Tzeentch: Shh, let Frank speak.

Perturabo: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.
Lorgar: What if it bites me and it dies!?
Mortarion: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Lorgar, learn to listen.
Curze: What if it bites itself and I die?
Fulgrim: That’s voodoo.
Horus: What if it bites me and someone else dies?
Lorgar: That’s correlation, not causation.
Curze: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?
Fulgrim: That’s kinky.
Perturabo: Oh my God.

Vulkan: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?
Mortarion: Have everyone stand.
Magnus: Bring three more chairs!
Fulgrim: The most important ones can sit down.
Angron: Kill three.