Wednesday, June 30, 2010

What every customer thinks

For the summer I'm working at a famous downtown Chicago attraction. Guests come from all over the world to see it. Some of them barely speak English. Others can't be bothered to do the tiny bit of research required to figure out how to get back to wherever it is they're going afterwards. Anyway, this is a guest mindset which, in my mind, pretty much sums up how everyone I have to deal with thinks.

Duh, I am the guest. You exist to serve me, peon. I expect you to know anything and everything about not only the attraction you work at, but every other attraction in Chicago. If what I came to see does not work, I will demand a refund and declare my entire day ruined because I can't be bothered to look at the 199 other things that do work. I will complain as though it's your fault, because nothing of mine has ever broken. When I ask you for information, no matter how good your answer is I will nod ignorantly and prompt you to continue. When you're explaining something unprompted, it can't possibly be important so I won't listen. If I give you an attitude you'll just have to deal with it; if you try to point out that I'm wrong, I'll say you're giving me an attitude and demand to see your supervisor. My brat kids will hang off the ticket counter after you tell them not to, and I will avoid the line and march right up to your station. It's your fault if I don't know how to print my tickets off online, or if I can't figure out that you're not free today, or if I mistook your attraction for a different one because I cannot understand English. In short, I am the priveliged guest and you are so far beneath me that I don't have to think twice about stepping on you.

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